A Seinfeld law?

I was not going to blog today - I don't really have an excuse... But then Michigan came calling and in an effort to not annoy, they have annoyed me. My dear friend Stan, writer at MarlinNut.com (read it and live longer) wrote the other day that he just wished he could understand people - Stan I am with you my man!

I cannot understand this or the people that put this ordinance and others like it in place. A Michigan City voted to Ban Annoying Behavior - really? As part of an amended harassment ordinance, the seven-member Brighton City Council voted this month to make annoying behavior a civil offense punishable by a $100 fine.

The legislation prohibits physical violence in public places, insulting another person in a public place or harassing another person by telephone, e-mail or other forms of communication.

RW comments: Physical violence - don't the police handle this? Harassing a person by telephone and email - once again aren't there restraining orders available? I know that, per email, I can block that person's email address or just have them go directly to junk mail... So why do the residents of this odd Michigan town need this Seinfeld esq law?

The law continues: "It shall be unlawful for a person to engage in a course of conduct or repeatedly commit acts that alarm or seriously annoy another person and that serve no legitimate purpose." The goes on to state - What people will be ticketed for are things like continued neighborhood disputes, repeated text messages or ongoing harassment between ex-spouses or former boyfriends and girlfriends.

RW comments: repeated text messages???? Really? As I read this, this law continues to amaze me. I want to move to Michigan, break this law and then take the city to council to court... Then again, would I be ticketed for being annoying by taking them to court? Going to court is annoying....

Sadly this is not a one off in the great state of Michigan - their pro football team can't win, they can't build cars Americans want and... there was recently issued a memorandum that listed more than a dozen similar ordinances in Michigan alone including, Northville's ordinance, for example, says it is unlawful not only to annoy, but to ogle, whistle or wolf-call at a person.

RW comments: Wolf-call??? Come on - only in Michigan does this lingo fly. Wolf-call. That is awesome! I am going to bring this term to So Cal - now if I can only figure out how to wolf-call... I would ask someone in Michigan but if they did it they would be breaking the law and my request could be perceived as annoying and then I would get a 100 dollar ticket... Rock and a hard place people...

Don't relax readers - There are many other cities in the United States that have ordinances against "annoying" behavior. Oak Ridge, N.C., has an ordinance against "unreasonably loud or annoying" music that interferes with "peace and good order." And Glendale, Ohio, has an entire ordinance devoted to unlawfully harboring annoying animals.

RW comments: This is what happens when people get power. Dangerous, bottom line. What is an annoying animal? A dog barking? A kittens early morning meow? Perhaps a neighbor that has a tiger caged up - is that annoying or just plain stupid and scary? Is there a law against being stupid for having scary pets? Are monkey's annoying? Throwing poo is not cool but if they are annoying then so are lamas - those jerks spit....gross.

The reality is that when contested most of these city council ordinances/laws/garbage/crap are unconstitutional. Sure you may have to go to the supreme court (how scary is that btw? Can you imagine the arrogance of the people that go to work at place that's name has supreme in it? The guy at Pizza Hut that controls when I get my supreme pizza is a jerk cause he is creating a supreme pizza... I can't imagine the egos in the supreme court - that is another blog on another day)... where was I? Supreme Court - so it may go all the way to the supreme court and then these all to wise city council members will be told they were wrong but not before you are buried in a mountain of legal costs. As Alice always tells me - you can not reason with the unreasonable... These city council members are unreasonable.

Do what I do - don't try to figure people out, you can't (sorry Stan) but you can be a good person, only annoy your friends in jest and fun and most importantly - live a good life, give back to those less fortunate and do your part to make this world a better place..... Merry Christmas

Best what???

The online world is supposed to make our live easier, more efficient and save on time especially when it comes to shopping. In most cases that is true - unless you are dealing with BestBuy.com the world's worst online retailer...



In late Nov. I got all excited about Black Monday - the cyber worlds Black Friday. This Monday is full of great deals, free shipping, etc.... This is what online shopping is all about. You get up early and unlike Black Friday, you don't even have to wait in line to get trampled you just log in and shop till the java gets cold or you have to shower up and go to work...



Black Monday was money for me! I ordered a new computer, new digital camera, Geek Service, etc... I was dropping some cash but saving some serious cash! I even paid for express shipping so that I could get my cool new toys within 3 days of ordering....



Wait for it, wait for it... hear the dooming music in the background.... My Yahoo account pings and there it was an email from BestBuy.com - my order update.... My computer, not in stock (the website still has the computer as "in stock"), the memory card for my camera - not in stock but the camera is (I did not know there was a run on camera memory cards), the Geek Service was still available and the free bag my computer came with was available. I called up BestBuy voiced my opinion and then just canceled my order. I just could not drop that kind of money and then wait a month or longer to get the goods.



As a side note - everyone else I ordered from on Black Monday came through strong. Clothes, cologne, other electronics, etc.... Only BestBuy found a way not to deliver -



A couple of weeks passed and I was in need of a gift for my little niece and nephew. Only BestBuy has the karaoke machine available and with a guarantee that it would get to their house before Christmas (I also checked, the local BestBuy in Stockton, CA had the item "in stock") so I foolishly clicked the buy button.



Hear the music, get ready... Yahoo pings me and there it is, the email from BestBuy.com....



Their delivery guarantee - yeah, not going to happen. They forgot to deliver it so the gift will not be making it to it's location on time. I could not be more upset so I did what anyone would and should do, I called BestBuy.com -



One representative told me, "I never shop online with our company. I go into the store. I hear about this happening all day long."



Customer complaints told me, "I have been hearing this all day long. I will transfer you back to BestBuy.com online order department. They can help you, I can't."



When I asked for a supervisor the first time I was hung up on.



I called back, that is just how I do it. When I got on the line with a representative I was told that my holiday gift would not make it there until the 30th of December. Now I understand that baby Jesus was not officially born on December 25th - I get that. And I understand that if Santa really existed Chris Hansen and Dateline's show, To Catch A Predator, would have found him. You can't do a B and E on a home to visit a little kid without Dateline knowing about it...



That written, kids expect to get gifts on a certain day of the year and that day would be the 25th... but my niece and nephew will have to wait until the 30th because BestBuy.com did not ship my order out on time.



Call two - I finally got through to a BestBuy.com manager. You have to watch customer service people - the "manager" tried to tell me that BestBuy shipped my gift (ordered on the 18th) was shipped out on the 19th but when I tracked it through UPS their comprehensive site showed that my gift did not leave BestBuy until the 22cnd... dirty. The manager tried to trick me....



I called him on it and he folded. The manager apologized and credited my card for the full amount of the purchase price. My gift will not make it until the 30th still - BestBuy would not go for my idea of having the manager of the Stockton store pack up my gift (it is in stock at the store per BestBuy.com) and drive it over to my brothers place.



Now the question remains, what will I do with a credit from a company that I do not want to do business with ever again??? Or should I give them another chance?



Two blogs today, none tomorrow... No more blogs until after Christmas...



Thanks for the day off Baby Jesus...

A moment on the lips...

Those kids at Men's Health try to figure out a way to make me depressed at least twice a week. They want to make sure that they ruin all the great foods that I love.

First, put away all the food you like.

Second, put away all sharp objects.

Third, barfing up food is not cool and gives you bad breath so don't do that either.

Fourth, if you are like me, you will read this, get depressed and then go back to eating whatever you want to while cursing Men's Health...

WORST COOKIE
Pillsbury Big Deluxe Classics White Chunk Macadamia Nut (dough; 1 cookie, 38 g)180 calories / 10 g fat(3 g saturated, 2 g trans)13 g sugars
FAT EQUIVALENT: 5 “fun” size 3 Musketeers bars

RW Comments: 180 calories in one cookie yet they can find a way to put only 1 calorie in diet Pepsi... This makes me wonder, how do they know that there are not a million cans of diet Pepsi out there (the one calorie cola) with no calories and one can with a million calories. They don't and with my luck, I would get the million calorie can of diet soda...

WORST CANDY
Twix (1 package, 2 oz)280 calories / 27 g sugars14 g fat (11 g saturated)
SATURATED FAT EQUIVALENT: 11 strips of bacon

RW Comments: Gives a whole new meaning of "two for me, none for you." Listen you chubby, greedy SOB - share and it will be like having 5 1/2 pieces of bacon... Jerk...

WORST CEREAL
Quaker 100% Natural Granola, Oats, Honey & Raisins (1 c)420 calories12 g fat (7 g saturated)6 g fiber / 30 g sugars
CALORIE EQUIVALENT: 8 chicken wings

RW Comments: I cannot believe that Quaker beat out Captain Crunch, Boo Berry, Count Chocula, Trix (that bunny be crazy!), Lucky Charms, Cookie Crisp - really a bowl of crunchy chocolate chip cookies is better for you then Quaker 100% Natural Granola Oats, Honey and Raisins.... Sick! Pour me another bowl of Cookie Crisps - legit breakfast...

WORST INDIVIDUAL SNACK
Hostess Chocolate Pudding Pie (1 pie)520 calories / 45 g sugars24 g fat (14 g saturated, 1.5 g trans)
SATURATED FAT EQUIVALENT: 2 McDonald’s Quarter Pounders

RW Comments: Bill Cosby always expressed to me that pudding is great for you. He talked up Jello pudding but I never thought there was a difference in puddings... I am still wondering, even though Jello did not make the list. BTW - pudding vs 2 quarter pounders... WOW!

WORST PACKAGED LUNCH
Oscar Mayer Maxed Out Turkey & Cheddar Cracker Combo Lunchables (1 package)680 calories / 61 g sugars22 g fat (9 g saturated, 1 g trans) / 1,440 mg sodium
CALORIE EQUIVALENT: 15 Chicken McNuggets

RW Comments: Is there a good packaged lunch for you out there? The simple answer is no and when McDonalds beats you out in the health factor then you have really lost.

WORST FROZEN PIZZA
DiGiorno for One Garlic Bread Crust Supreme Pizza850 calories / 1,450 mg sodium44 g fat (15 g saturated, 3.5 g trans)
CALORIE EQUIVALENT: 6 slices Domino’s Thin N Crispy Cheese Pizza

RW Comments: First you can't compare apples with apples. Bacon and cookies - I am cool with that because then I have alternative option but delivery vs DiGiorno, not cool at all.... Now I have no choice - either way I am stuck with pizza!

WORST FROZEN ENTRÉE
Hungry-Man Classic Fried Chicken1,020 calories / 1,570 mg sodium57 g fat (12 g saturated)
CALORIE EQUIVALENT: 5 Krispy Kreme Original Glazed Doughnuts

RW Comments: Can you eat 5 donuts in one sitting and not get the sugars? The simple answer is no, so I have to lean on the Hungry-Man classic. That written if you compare Hungry-Man toDiGiorno - well the tastes like delivery frozen treat beats out the fried chicken delight.

Eat, drink, be merry party people - Santa Claus is coming to town.

Pen Palling

First - I cannot believe it has taken me this long to find this GEM on the information super highway.... Second - Your tax dollars are paying for this service and the PR around this service. Third - many states are in a budget crisis but the Internet is still rocking and rolling; I guess it is a God given right to get online.

So what am I babbling about, www.prisonpenpals.net - the best site ever! I mean, ever. Lonely? Need more people to read your sarcastic blog about non sense? What to talk with someone you will never have to meet? This is your site fo sho!

A little about this "gem" - this diamond in the rough... Let's rock this like Joe Friday give you just the facts!

1. Over 1 MILLION visitors in 2007 – tell a friend about this site (don't, no do - so awesome)

2. Site Updated DAILY - A dedicated staff of employees & volunteers keep this site the BIGGEST, best, most updated & current site on the Internet for prisoners seeking pen pals.

3. Accept no imitations. Don't be rude and don't go with some Johnny Come Lately site - stay with the kids that not only paved the way to email correspondents with prisoners but also created the electronic road into the prisons. Makes me think about all those horror movies where the prison died but his/her electronic spirit lived in the spirit until the spirit founds it way online and then haunts people that cannot figure out how to unplug their computer.

4. Featured in “The New York Times”, “The Ricki Lake Show”, MSNBC's - "HOMEPAGE" television show, 11/2000 feature article in Cosmopolitan magazine, hundreds of newspapers, magazines & radio shows all over the world. Let's be honest, when you make it on Ricki Lake, then you have made it - bottom line.

5. Most importantly, don't limit yourself with the fly by night prison pen pal sites. PrisonPenPals.net has prisoners from the USA, Australia, Africa, Canada, Egypt, Belgium, England & Ireland.

Let's meet some prisoners -

Name: Rebecca Cleland
Convicted Of - Conspiracy to 187 PC
Release Date - Life without Parole
Rebecca opted out of the bio page but did give a picture. Life without parole means that unless they watch Prison Break in the joint she is a safe bet. She will not be getting out and then showing up on your door step. FYI - an 187 is cop and legal lingo for murder.

Name: Shirley Franklin
Convicted Of - Probation Violation
Release Date - 02/2009
Bio/Intro: Hello I'm Shirley, an intriguing woman who's seeking her soul mate, friend, love, poss more. Feel free to ask me all you want about anything. I'm all yours. I will relocate. I have no kids yet. I I'm educated, I have (1) yr. medical training, 2 yrs. college for business/computer tech. I'm from Northern, CA, born/raised. My dad is passed away (2) sisters both married. My mom is alive/well. It's my 1st time in here for probation violation and my last. Send me your home phone no. so I can call/talk to you. I like all sports, all music, no rap, all movies, indoor/outdoor activities, art, antiques, reading, writing romance, massages giving, receiving, kissing, walks, cuddling, picnics, travel, animals, city/country areas, cooking, cleaning, your age and all makes no difference. I am honest, faithful, fun, sexy, sweet, kind, giving, loyal, intelligent, love to work, clean, healthy drug and all free so please write me I'd love to meet you. So good night, sweet dreams, kisses.

This was just a bit to informational for me. It read more like Craigslist than a pen pal but what do I know, I just found this site.

Name: Ofelia Smutny
Convicted Of - Conspiracy to Deliver Meth
Release Date - 08/15/10
I like give a warning about those that deliver meth. That is not the crowd you want to run with. Write at your own risk....

I only have one more of these in me... and with that written, ladies I did not want to leave you out. Plus an election year just ended so I really wanted to post this guy...

Name: Clinton Bush
Convicted Of - Possession of a Firearm by a Convicted Felon
Release Date - 2012
Bio/Info: My name is Clinton Bush. I am incarcerated for possession of a firearm by a convicted felon. My release date is 6/12/12. I am reaching out to someone special, a special woman to write, to talk to and grow together as a companion. Please know that I am not in the business of using women for any reason. I am financially AOK. I hope that you like these pictures. Race is not important

In all seriousness - every prison official interviewed on these pen pal operations warn that almost 100% of the time it is scam by prisoners to get money, attention and perhaps a place to stay when they get out of the joint. So be careful - but I do recommend taking a gander at the site it is interesting.